Goodbye Thailand.

I am so unbelievably and extremely sad right now. This sadness can not be explained with words. I am at a complete loss to try to explain how utterly depressed I am at the moment. I just can't believe that I am leaving Thailand. The last year and a half of my life has been so wonderful...why would one want to leave a place that brings them complete, all encompassing, fulfilling joy and happiness? How or where do I even begin to explain what Thailand has shown me, taught me, given me, provided me? I can't. It's damn near impossible. Simply put is that Thailand was the best decision I have ever made. Now I know there are great things ahead for me in my life but I just want to grieve for a moment or two or five.
It feels like yesterday I was packing up my personal belongings and moving to the other side of the world. As I sit here crying I am flooded with lessons learned, opportunities and experiences I have had in Thailand. I am confident to say one lesson learned while living here was patience. Dealing with a culture very unfamiliar to my own and not speaking the language requires a great deal of patience. Dealing with various offices within ABAC involves a lot of patience. Traveling throughout Thailand calls for patience. I have had hundreds of opportunities here...traveling has been a big one. Living here I was able to travel to some AMAZING countries...Japan, Laos, Vietnam, Cambodia, Malaysia, Indonesia and I am leaving tonight for Hong Kong, then China, and South Korea. As for experiences...thousands upon thousands. I...I...I...need a minute. Okay okay...I am okay. So while living in Thailand I had a plethora of visitors. I am so happy that so many people were able to come and experience a little bit of Thailand with me. I will cherish those moments.
And the people I have met here. The friendships I have made. Some I will be leaving here in Thailand, some I will be going to visit in a few short weeks, some will be scattered around the USA and thankfully some will be returning to Chicago as well. There have been a lot of people (fellow teachers) that without them here my experience would not be the same... Shannon, Jenn, Ladky, Marani, Jorge, and Brenda...to name a few. Together we have laughed, we have grown, we have traveled, we have comforted, we have danced, we have lived. Thank you all for the best time of my life. You have challenged me, made me think, aided me in re-evaluating things in my life, listened to me, and been there for me. And for this I thank you. I am glad you are a part of my life. And of course I can't forget Em, Nui, Ae, New, and Boom my lovely lovely friends that I have made in Thailand...I truly wish I could fit you in my backpack and take you home with me. I will miss the times we have shared. Please come to Chicago soon! I feel so lucky to have lived here in this beautiful country. I am so thankful I took that giant leap and completely went outside my comfort zone. I will always have fond memories of my time here. I love you Thailand.

What will and won't be missed...

Here's a short short list of what I'll miss:
The Thai people, the culture, the ruins, street food everywhere, the respect for the King, the smiles, the genuineness, the islands, chang beer, motorbike taxis, songtails, the klong, the 20baht earrings, the language barrier, fresh fruit, Ekamaii, monks, somtom, sticky rice, the warm weather all year round, the cost of living, Red Fan, Grandma's, Jim Jum, Tuk Tuks, Buddhism, Wats, massages, tom yum, the rural landscape, chai nom yen.

What I won't miss:
The Thai brooms, lesson planning, the pollution, the language barrier, my clothes smelling like fried chicken, always sweating, firing range across the street, BangNa, the horrible plywood mattresses, cold showers, the monsoon rain, the shameless public nose picking, cockroaches, rancid smells, dried squid, squatter toilets, having to carry toilet paper all the time.

Oh Thailand. What a great ride its been.

Farewell my Koh Samet

Brenda, Jorge, Shannon and myself headed for our final weekend getaway to the beloved Koh Samet. We arrived Friday and didn't even make it to the beach before stopping for sum tom, sticky rice, and some beer. One beer turned into 12 beers which turned into a fun and fabulous night of awesomeness. First bingo, then random bottle games including a game of ring toss, and finally a sing along song...good times...and the fun had only just begun. The next two days, lets just say, were well spent resting on the beach. Fast forward to Sunday afternoon...having to say goodbye to Koh Samet (literally my 2nd home in Thailand) was quite difficult. More so than I had anticipated. A tear here a tear there. My heart is sad. I can't believe I am leaving. Where did the time go?

Sukhothai

Earlier in the week I ventured north to Sukhothai...which literally translates to 'Dawn of Happiness' and had a wonderful time. I took a morning train (for 6 hours) to Phitsanulok where I wandered around aimlessly for a few hours not knowing where I was or what I was doing before jumping on a motorbike taxi to the bus station and catching an early evening bus to Sukhothai. Here I found the cutest little family run guesthouse, had some delicious dinner then went for an evening stroll around town.
In the morning I headed to Old Sukhothai Historical Park. A brief history lesson for you... Sukhothai was established as Thailand's capital from 1238-1448. After this time the capital was moved to Ayutthaya until 1767 when it fell to the Burmese. Then moved for 15 years to Thonburi and then Bangkok, the current capital. The Sukhothai Historical Park covers the ruins of the ancient glorious Sukhothai Kingdom. UNESCO declared it a World Heritage Site in December 1991. Here I rented a bicycle and went exploring. It sure was a hot day but still I managed to bike around for about 4 hours. As I rode around I was all smiles. I was quite content biking through all the ruins. Such a lovely place. Wish I had more time there. But alas I had to head back to Bangkok on an overnight train to finish up some loose ends before I start my traveling.

2010 Visitors: Final Round

My last crew of visitors came and went. Paige, Joe, and Diana were here for the last 10 days and it was all sorts of silliness. First night we chilled at an outdoor "bar" and had ourselves a few Chang beers. Day two was filled with wats, temples, the heat, Khao San Road, pad thai, eating grasshoppers, fish massages, and video interviews for the Thailand Tourism Website (link to my awkward, fidgety, repeating self interview video at the end of this blog post).
After Bangkok for a few days we jumped on an overnight train and headed south to Suart Thani where we then grabbed a bus to take us further south to Krabi. Total travel time: 17 hours...yeah wont be doing that again...oh wait I am...I will...two more times...in China. Ha. Anyways Krabi...AKA Beautifulness. 6 days of beach, beach, and more beach. Joe and Diana went rock climbing, Paige and Diana rode elephants, and we all hiked up to this amazing viewpoint. Paige, Diana and I celebrated St. Paddy's day at the beach drinking Changs and playing drinking games. Needless to say, day drinking at the beach makes an early night in but entirely worth it. What a great day!
After the beach we flew back to Bangkok and went shopping at Suan Luam Night Bazaar. Afterwards, Paige, Diana, and myself met up with some of my friends here at an outdoor club and had a night full of deep down belly laughs.
And finally their last day in Thailand...we found ourselves in the middle of a Red Shirt March down Ramkhamhaeng Road. "Since the 2006 ousting of Thaksin Shinawatra, Thailand's former prime minister, the country has been gripped by waves of political protest. Ten of thousands of opposition supporters paraded across Bangkok in an attempt to encourage the city's residents to support their calls for the government to step down. They moved across Bangkok in an 13km-long convoy of motorcycles and pickup trucks" (taken from a news source online). It sure was a wild sight to see. Afterwards, we had a packing party trying to stuff suitcases full of Thailand goodies. And finally off the airport to say our goodbyes...however it was more like c-ya laters as I will be seeing them and you in 6 weeks when I arrive back to Chitown!!!
Thailand Tourism video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ns8GeAy7kI&feature=player_embedded

Round 2 of 2010 visitors...

Another visitor has come and gone...Suzanne spent 8 days here in wonderful Thailand. As with all my visitors, we had a lot on our plate. First up, we headed over to the Bangkok Art and Culture Center to see a few exhibits and one in particular I had been wanting to see (Wall Art)...which was awesome. We also headed to Khao San Road (backpackers central) and met up with a few friends. Here we were invited to temple with Nui for the following day for Macha Bucha Day (a Buddhist holy day, marking a point in history when 1,250 of Buddha's followers gathered to hear his sermon. It's a day when worshippers walk three times around temples in a bid to make merit). So the next day we spent touristing it up...Grand Palace, Wat Arun, and Wat Pho.
Then rushed home to change into our all white attire to head to temple with Nui, his family, and Shannon.*Sidenote...Several months ago I headed to this same temple to watch Nui become a monk (absolutely one of the most beautiful, magnificent, touching, and astonishing things I have ever witnessed in my life). When we arrived to this complex, I saw just what we were in for...another amazing experience! Amongst the sea of white were monks in a sea of orange all sitting around the gigantic gold temple. And there were a million or so (okay not really) 4 feet lanterns placed in the ground with a person sitting behind each one. To start the festivities was an hour of meditation...Nui gave us the play by play, step by step instructions on how to meditate and to concentrate to find a crystal ball in the center of our stomach...needless to say, I couldn't see it, but for that hour I was in a world all of my own...listening contently to the thousands of Thai Buddhists around me chanting and meditating...a smile was firmly planted on my face and in my heart the entire time. Simply a joyous occasion. The next day we headed north to Ayutthaya to see some ruins. Then off to Ko Chang island for a few days of sun, sea, beach, and tattoo. Yup, I got a new tattoo. สุขใจ = Suk Jai...means 'happy heart, mind, and spirit'. I love love love it. After 4 glorious days at the beach we were back in BKK. We met up with friends and danced the night away at Ekamaii and had ridiculous amounts of fun. And finally Suzanne's last day...we went to JJ market to buy lots of souvenirs and goodies. And so last night I took her to the airport and today I was back running around the city preparing things for the next set of visitors that get here on Thursday! And I just spent the last 6 hours finishing all my grading to turn in tomorrow morning. Finally, at 12:30am I have finished grading! Woosh. Only a few more requirements (proctoring) and I am done done done!

Adjarn Heidi over and out

Today was my last and final day playing teacher in Thailand. I am mixed with sadness, fear, excitement and happiness...what a combination! I am sad that my time in Thailand is ending, fear of the unknown, excited about my visitors from home and to start traveling again, and happy cause I am happy! Today my students had to present posters they created about what they learned in my English I Conversation classes. Not only were some of these posters amazing...the speeches they gave were so genuine, heartfelt, and adorable. Who knew I taught them anything besides how to play games like Cheers Governor, Jeopardy, and the Telephone game???

I also had a group of students present me with two Thai Flower Garlands ("Phuang Malai" in Thai). These are skillfully hand-woven fresh flower garlands. They are traditionally hung in front of Buddha statues, pictures of monks, on spirit houses, and on the rear view mirror in cars. Garlands are presented at many festive and happy occasions, such as graduations, birthdays and weddings, for good luck. Thais use them for virtually every occasion – to say everything from “I'm sorry” to “Thank you”. Typically they are made from jasmine flowers and have the most intoxicating smell. Currently, I am basking in the lovely aroma that has filled my room...what a heavenly smell.
I can't believe that I am done....yahooooooo....no more lesson planning EVER, thank God. No more dictation, no more pronunciation, no more grammar, no more telling my students to PLEASE SPEAK ENGLISH!!! No more grading, oh wait...finals...I still have to do that. Oh and I still have to proctor 7 exams over the next 3 weeks...okay okay THEN I am done for good! Wooooohoooo!
Below are some pictures of my classes and some of the posters they created.

Sharing the love.

This morning Shannon and I made our way to Camillian Home Orphanage to share some love and smiles...this wonderful place cares for orphans living with HIV/AIDS and disabilities. We were greeted with a quick tour of the facility and then off to playtime with some amazing kiddos. Here I spent some time playing with a 15 year old kid, Pan. We couldn't talk to each but we could play together. Then, before I knew it it was lunchtime....a pizza party. Right before lunch, an adorable child nick-named, Rat, played a few songs on his guitar. After lunch, it was busier than an airport with all the paper planes we were flying in the air. Zoom Zoom. This 3 year old cutie-pie to the left, Mos, was all over it...his giggles were loud and genuine...it was great. Here is their website, if you want to learn more about this fabulous place. www.camillianhomelatkrabang.org/
After the orphanage, Shannon and I headed to Chinatown for some Chinese New Year Celebrations. 2010 is the year of the Tiger...which is a sign of courage and bravery. So if you were born in 1950, 1962, 1974, 1986, or 1998 this is your Chinese Zodiac animal. My Chinese Zodiac sign is the Horse...people born in the year of the Horse believe that their aim in life is "to seek individual freedom and happiness." Yeah? I dig. Anyways, we set out on foot and walked around aimlessly for a while taking in the sights, sounds, and smells. Oh, what a good day...good day indeed!



Happy Valentine's Day ♥

Travels booked, I'm heading home!!!

Finally, all my travels plans have been set! YAY! I am soooo excited however extremely sad at the same time. How am I going to say goodbye to Thailand? The sheer thought of it makes me ill. As for my travels...first up HONG KONG for 5 days by myself. Then I meet up a travel group of 8 people and we set forth into CHINA for 3 weeks. We end in BEIJING where I will stay an extra day or two. Then I will be heading to SOUTH KOREA via ferryboat. I will be in SEOUL for 4 days before boarding a plane to PORTLAND, OREGON, USA where I will meet up with my dear friend Jenn for 5 days. Then, finally, its Heidi's long awaited arrival back to CHICAGO. May 3rd people May 3rd!

This last year and half of my life has been nothing short of amazing. The experiences here have been very rewarding in so many ways. I have seen and done some unbelievable things. I have also learned alot....most importantly about myself. I truly wonder how I am going to say goodbye to Thailand, a place where I found what I was looking for...pure, undeniable, all-consuming and fulfilling happiness...I may just weep like a baby. But, let's not cry yet...I still have another 6 weeks to enjoy. And bonus, I still have 4 visitors making their way over to the Land of Smiles...starting with Suzanne who will be here in less than 2 weeks!!!

I do question what things will be like at home. It will definitely be different, I am different. Moving back in with my mom and into my childhood room is going to be interesting and trying to find a job that I adore may be troublesome, but I know its out there! And there are sooo many things I am looking forward to....numeral uno...meeting my new nieces/nephews! First baby (Adrianne and Matt's) is arriving in 4 weeks! Mid-march!!! Baby two (Sean and Megan's) end of March/beginning of April!!! YAHOOOOO! Can't wait to meet the munchkins when I get home in May!

1st round of visitors 2010...

Last week through the beginning of this week I was lucky to have Matt, Jeremy, and Nate come to Thailand for a visit. I was excited about this visit and was looking forward to their arrival. They had one week here and we managed to do a lot in a short amount of time. On the night of their arrival I took them to Khao San Road, the infamous backpackers row...where they ate street pad thai and drank a tower of Chang beer. The next day we headed to see wats/temples...Grand Palace and Wat Pho. The two places are must sees in Thailand. After exploring the temples we went out for an evening above the skyline. We went to Skybar- an outdoor al fresco bar at the 64th floor of the Lebu State Tower...right along the river....it was absolutely beautiful. The next day it was see yah later Bangkok and off to Phuket we went. After settling in, it was time to head to the beach...and we took in a few of the warm Thailand sun rays. The next day we parked it on the beach the entire day...what a great and relaxing day. On Saturday we went on a snorkeling day trip which was awesome...we went to a little island (Raya island) about 30 minutes from Phuket where we saw some cool looking fish and some pretty clear waters. Now, I have been snorkeling a handful of times but there was one spot here where the waters were so clear you could see about 15 feet down, it was breathtaking. Sunday it was back to Bangkok and we went to Suan Luam Night Bazaar and they did some Thailand souvenir shopping. Monday was a busy day...we headed to Wat Arun, had two hour Thai massages, ate sashimi, the boys got fitted for custom made suits and then went to see Muay Thai fights at night....where we got to see a knock-out occur. It was crazy. And Tuesday, we went Asian style and took the transportation the locals take...the klong. It was a long boat ride sitting on wooden benches on a hot Bangkok day....probably not the smartest move on my part...but at least they got to see where I teach and a Thai neighborhood. Finally, it was time for them to leave. I took them to the airport, we said our farewells and goodbyes and off they went. It was a lot of fun. I had a great time and from what I could tell they did too.

Merit Making

This morning, Boom took Shannon and I to temple. Going to temple in Thailand is like going to church in America. When one goes to temple you go to make merit. Making merit is a way of life for most Thai people. There are a few ways of making merit that I have found. One way is to give alms (which is where you give offerings to monks when they walk down your street). Another way is to buy a basket or bucket filled with water, candles, incense, toilet paper, and other things the monks need. These baskets are given to the monks at temple (this is what I did today). Donating to the temple is another way to make merit. Being generous to those less fortunate is also a staple in the merit making process. One more way of making merit is through prayer, usually done at the local temple. Opening ones mind to the spiritual side will gain individual merit. Making merit is a way to gain happiness in this life and a better position in the next life. Monks usually give a blessing to people that have been to temple to make merit. Thais believe that this merit-making will bring them good fortune. Today after we bought our bucket, Boom asked us to write names of deceased family members we wanted to remember on a sheet of paper (I wrote Deda). This was then later given to the monk to read aloud, along with a chant and then burned. After a few minutes of chanting. The paper was burned and held over a small brass bowl which collected the ashes. Boom took the bowl along with a little kraft of water and brought back to where we were kneeling. Here while the monk said a prayer chant in Thai, we (Shannon and I) placed a hand on Boom as she poured the water into the bowl. Afterwards Boom took the bowl of water and ashes to a tree outside, and poured the water over roots of a tree and was to make a wish to the spirits. And now the ceremony was over. When Boom came back inside, the three of us went closer to the monk and he placed a white sheet over us and said a Thai prayer wishing us good luck. He then handed Boom several white string bracelets to be tied on our wrists. I now have two white strings on my left wrist. The strings are blessed by the monks before they are handed out. This thread/string is called sai sin and putting them on the wrist helps in the form of safety, good health/wealth and protection from evil spirits. Now, I have heard two different rules about how long to keep the string on... 1. Some Thais say you can remove the strings after three days (if you remove it you must untie the knots and not cut it off) 2. Or you wear them until they fall off which in some cases can be years...I have not decided which to do yet. I think I am going to ask around...perhaps I'll ask my students on Monday what they do.

A whole new world...Samet.

Samet...as you know is one of my favorite places in Thailand. But this time, Shannon and I decided to explore some unfamiliar ground. Instead of turning left, as we have every single time, we turned right when we got off the boat. We walked a bit and stopped at this cute little German guesthouse (Baan-Pra-Kai-Kaew) and got a room right on the water. After sunning ourselves at the beach we decided to go for a walk and explore this new area. We walked past kiddos laughing and playing in the road, past homemade surfboard boats, walked along piers, watched a game of volleyball, and climbed some rocks.
Along our walk, Shannon mentioned she wanted wine. I decided to accept that challenge and so we set off to find wine. Low and behold we purchased two bottles of Thailands finest (uh-huh) wine from 7/11...yes you heard me 7/11. HA. These were little mini bottles but they did the job....not to mention the few other glasses I had after dinner. But who's counting? I was in a fit of giggles the rest of the night. We were playing cards and at times I had tears in my eyes laughing so hard at who knows what. Its moments like these that I live for. So happy. And on my last day there (Shannon had left the day before), as I headed to the pier to head back to Bangkok, a woman stopped me and asked if I wanted a ride...in her little side-car...ummm sure why not...I have always wanted to. I felt like a 7 year old kid laughing as we went up and down the hills and hit bumps and took sharp turns. When she dropped me off I thanked her and she said "Mai Pen Rai, ka" (No worries). How unbelievably nice of that woman. She wanted nothing in return. I was so lucky to receive this random act of kindness. I am happy that people like this exist in our world....makes me want to do some random acts of kindness too.

Thank you.

Last night I was thinking about my life - who I am, how I got here, where I have been, where I want to go, what I have done, what I am going to do, who I know, and who I have yet to meet...and I am so very thankful. I feel so lucky. Sometimes I pinch myself to see if its all real, is this really my life? I know I didn't get to this place alone and I have an absolutely amazing support system behind me. I am so very grateful and appreciative. One person, in particular, has always helped me get to where I want to be and continually encourages me to do my best...thank you for believing in me, thank you for helping me grow, thank you for listening to me, thank you for pushing me, thank you for being you...mom!